This song was written probably a decade back now. It’s in honor of the many men and women who’ve served our country, and the mom’s and dad’s they left back home,

The idea for this song came from a single radio spot.

Throughout the day, between songs and commercials, soldiers were given a minute or so to say ‘hi’ to the folks back home.

One particular young man came on. To me he was obviously missing home and a little scared.  It was one of those things you could hear in his voice more than the words he was saying.

I was thinking in my mind about what his mama would think if she heard him. And then trying to balance the emotions of her baby boy out there, praying he’ll be alright

The song was written from a perspective of what she might want to hear him say no matter what he encountered in his service to his country.

As we roll into our countries 250th birthday, I’ll say thanks to the many men and women serving to give us the freedom we enjoy in the greatest country on the planet.

Here’s a demo of, I’ll Be Alright (not me singing on this one).

 

 

Even though our 250th anniversary is coming up here in America, the idea for the song below is several years old. I only recently got around to finishing it.

There’s a lot of political, religious, and ideological unrest in this country.

Deep convictions.

I have my own brand of them, too,

I’m not here to speak on that. What I am here to say is this: no matter what you believe, the man in this song, like your neighbours, relatives, and people you know today, made it possible for you to live as you do.

That includes those who feel it necessary to desecrate or destroy the very symbol they carried to provide you the freedom you enjoy right now…

Our flag.

Think about that a minute or two.

Those who laid down their life so we could make it 250 years… Did they share your ideals? Or maybe they didn’t.

They didn’t ask you before they put on the uniform and did their job. They respected you as a free human being.

Also consider this:

“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

That’s a quote often mistakenly attributed to Voltaire, but it’s profound just the same.

Some continue to make that same defense non-verbally, from a coffin six feet under.

Let’s honour that by treating each other with the same respect they gave you with their life.

No, that’s not me singing in this one.

 

Man, it’s been a while since I’ve posted here. A lot of time ticked by and a lot of songs under the bridge… ahem, little guitar joke there.

Anyway, I started this song a week and a half ago with a groove I had clamped down on the bench. I wrote it over a couple days when I had time. It’s been laying around here until I got a chance to slap down a dirt roads version of it.

I decided to write this one out loud, if anyone is interested. That means you’re witnessing my changes and etc. as I go along.

What to say about it?

As I got to messing with the groove, it just felt like a driving song about a young guy with the attitude, “no one is ever going to tie me down.”

While that may be the case for a few, it’s not for the rest of us, and somehow we’re all perfectly happy with it. This song actually went through 3 or 4 title changes. In fact, the song started out about a lady feeling bad about her sweetie’s old high-school jacket getting eaten up by moths. It was an interesting concept and I had a verse and chorus written. It wasn’t bad, but it just felt wrong for this song, so I scrapped it.

That’s the thing about songwriting. You got to be willing to slay those ideas. Oh, it’s there if I ever want to go back, but I like the direction I took once I stuffed the jacket idea in the glove box of the song’s journey.

The title came to me from a line in a John Legend song, All of Me.

“My head’s under water but I’m breathin’ fine.”

I thought, dang, I like that. So began to work around the idea of this kid feeling like getting tied down would suffocate him or stop his breathing, you know, kill him.

But as second verses would have it, you have to go someplace with it, so I turned verse one on it’s ear, then outward into the universe in the bridge. Does it work? You decide. Lyrics below player.

One note. There are changes in the works. Ditching the “slamming” bass. Also making it clearer who said what. No, the kid in the song did not say “screw that” to his mom. See what happens if you get too much in your own head when writing? A couple other changes too. Just hadn’t gotten to them yet. When I do, I’ll post them.

 

 

Still Breathing Fine

I remember it well
Eighteen and cocky as hell-yeah-yeah
When my old man
Turned down our showdown slamming bass
Well Mom’s got a couple of odd jobs for me out back
Th’ew the cooler in my truck looked up and said “screw that…”

Chorus:
Man that’s one cold day
When a woman tries to tame this stray, and I
Think I’d turn blue and die
Funny how choices change
When someone comes to shake that stage of life
Thank God I’d chosen right
And still breathing fine

He’s doing well
43 and cocky as hell yeah-yeah
My old man
Rolled in with a thing for those old Bass
Well dad my bad but I promised the day to Beth
He gave in to a crappy grin and faked a blue-faced breath

[Repeat chorus]

Yeah I’m thinkin’ some kid’s fishin’
Somewhere out on some lake
Hearin’ voices, feelin’ choices
To keep fishing or cut bait

[Repeat chorus]

Man, that’s one cool day
When we’re in that boat with a choice to make and I
Thank God I’d chosen right
And still breathin’ fine
And still breathin’ fine

 

©2023 Brad Dunsé, ASCAP

 

See below the original note for the re-write I settled on.

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Hey, thanks for stopping by. Can you help me with an experiment?

I’ll explain why I need help when I reach enough comments at the end of the experiment. I don’t need a ton of them. A dozen or so should do.

And I’m not trying to be mysterious here. It’s just if I tell you why I need your help now, it might affect  the result.

Your participation here will directly help other songwriters in the end.

All I need you to do is read the below lyric, and give as much original detailed songwriting feedback as you can. If you can be specific, that’s a big help.

While I appreciate stuff like “This song is lame” or “This song is touching.” Whatever you have to say, give your reasons you feel a certain way at various points in the song.

The good, the bad, the ugly, the charming, the touching, the wretched.

Whatever you want to say. I’ve got gator skin. You aren’t going to hurt my feelings.

That’s it.

Here we go. Jusst e-mail them to me directly.

And thanks.

Stagger Lee

 

©2021 Brad Dunsé/Beach feet Publishing, LLC

 

She scuffled down the sidewalk
With her shopping cart full of clothes
A Walmart bag shivered in the wind full of everything she owned
Labeled just a drunk
Cause she’d slip off on the grass
Rumor was, her morning started straight off the flask
Her weathered face looked kind a mean
So they called her Stagger Lee

 

I met her at the sidewalk
With a twenty in my hand
When her eyes met mine I’d knew I’d never understand
All the pain she’d been through
All the trouble all the loss
I could hear it in her voice, she paid some kind of cost
A neighbor yelled out, son you are naïve
Don’t you know that’s Stagger Lee

 

[Bridge]

Watching her walk down the street
I wonder who she really was
Was she someone’s grandma
Was she loved?

She got down to her corner
Turned to me and smiled
We stared at one another for a while
I wondered if this town would ever see
She was more than Stagger Lee

 

The gossip at the diner
Came with the morning news
The woman that they found face down was Linda McCloo
The photograph was blurry
The news print smeared from snow
Weren’t no one in that place who really didn’t know
Still they made a choice to see
It was just old Stagger Lee

 

At the end of my driveway
I found a shopping cart full of clothes
A Walmart bag blowing in the wind full of everything she owned.

Stagger Lee

©2023 Brad Dunsé, ASCAP/Beach feet Publishing, LLC

Verse1:
She’d scuffle down the sidewalk
With her shopping cart full of clothes
A Walmart bag shivered in the wind full of everything she owned
Seen as just a drunk
Cause she’d stumble on the cracks
Rumor was her morning started straight from the flask
Her weathered skin made her look mean
So they called her Stagger Lee

Verse 2:
I met her at the sidewalk
With a twenty in my hand
When her eyes met mine I’d knew I’d never understand
The hollow in her eyes
The demons that she Faught
The hunch ridin’ on her back said she paid some kind of cost
A neighbor yelled out, son you are naïve
Don’t you know that’s Stagger Lee?

Bridge:
Watchin’ her walk down the street
I wondered who she really was
Was she someone’s grandma… was she loved?
She reached the corner
With a  nod  she almost smiled
We stared at one another for a while
I wondered if this town would ever see
She’s more than Stagger Lee

Verse 3:
The gossip at the diner
Came with the morning news
The woman that they found face down was Nancy Anne McClew
The headline print was blurry
And the photo smeared from snow
But there weren’t no one in that place who really didn’t know
Still they made a choice to see
Oh it was just old Stagger Lee

Outro:
At the end of my driveway
I found a shopping cart full of clothes
A Walmart bag shiverin’ in the wind full of everything she owned.

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That’s it. Got comments?  Jusst e-mail them to me directly.